Emotional Intelligence: Social Awareness (Part 3 of 4)
22m | Sep 14, 2026Part 3 of a four-part series on emotional intelligence. Parts 1 and 2 covered self-awareness and self-management - what is happening inside you. This episode turns outward to social awareness: the ability to read a room, to notice what other people are feeling, and to respond to what they actually need rather than what you assume they need.
Ashleigh covers what social awareness is and is not, why recognizing someone's emotions is not the same as agreeing with them, and the signals of low social awareness - interrupting, dominating conversations, joking in sensitive moments, and defaulting to a victim mindset when you are the common denominator.
She then gives three ways to develop it:
1. Ask one question: "Do you want me to be your friend or do you need me to be your leader?" She walks through what each answer sounds like in business, tells the story of the team member who chose "leader" during a family crisis, and shows how the same question works with your kids.
2. Put yourself in someone else's shoes and assume positive intent instead of negative intent - the speeding driver, the kid who blows up after school, the customer who does not message you back.
3. Be fully present. Ninety-three percent of communication is non-verbal, and multitasking costs you all of it.
Content note: this episode includes a story, shared with permission, about a friend whose teenage daughter attempted to take her own life. It runs from roughly 13:58 to 17:10.
CHAPTERS
00:00 Welcome back and the coaching call giveaway
00:48 Start with Part 1 if you missed it
01:18 Can you read the room?
01:37 Why pattern recognition became my superpower
01:59 What's happening in me vs. what's happening in you
02:30 The friend who can't see me
03:17 Social awareness is about you seeing other people
03:40 The questions that test your social awareness
04:24 Empathy, listening, and perspective-taking
05:23 Recognizing emotions isn't the same as agreeing
06:02 Get curious instead of assuming the worst
06:29 Be what they need, not what you think they need
06:55 The two versions of me
07:52 The Mario hat from Target
08:34 "I'm putting my red hat on now"
09:19 Different people need different things
10:38 The habits that signal low social awareness
11:09 When you're the common denominator
11:54 How to develop social awareness
12:32 Tip 1: Friend or leader?
13:58 A story I've told many times, with permission
17:10 Don't assume you know what someone needs
18:22 Tip 2: Put yourself in someone else's shoes
18:55 Assume positive intent
20:38 Tip 3: Be fully present
21:14 The power of people watching
21:48 You always have a choice
Enter the giveaway for a free 30-45 minute one-on-one coaching call: leave a five-star review, screenshot it, and tag @theashleighmayfield on Instagram or Facebook.
