Sixty five thousand five hundred thirty six  

Too Big for sixteen bits but only by  

One (which is arguably odd) Plus  

Two which gives a binary nod to  

Four with a prefix of quad like  

Eight arms on your stuffed octopod but soon

Sixteen candles to share and

Thirty two flavors at the county fair  

Sixty four squares on our chess board  

One twenty eight summer weekends, then a girl you can't ignore  

Two fifty six days from darkness to light  

Five twelve for you both just half a kilobyte  

One thousand twenty four to communicate

One thousand twenty four to communicate

Two thousand forty eight at the bus stop every day 

Four thousand ninety six steps to climb  

Eighty one ninety two on your own to try

Sixteen thousand three hundred eighty four with a wife

Thirty two thousand seven hundred sixty eight max signed integer a life

Sixty five thousand five hundred thirty five

The most these sixteen bits can hold and survive

(Don’t want to overflow)

I’m gonna overflow

Why did the chicken cross the road?

To munch on bugs where the garden grows.

Seeds and corn and grains oh my

Veggies and worms give them a try. 

Why did the chicken cross the road?

To lunch on snacks where the garden grows.

How long do chickens live you say?

About 8 years give or take a day.

Some live longer, some live less.

some know nuggets are the very best

How long do chickens live you say?

nice hens lay till they're old and gray.

Chickens make eggs so nice and round

white brown or speckled ones to be found

scramble them up or fry in a pan

chickens help feed every family plan

what comes out when the eating's done?

chicken poop! oh isn't it fun?

it helps the plants grow big and tall

so don't be scared, poop helps us all

why did the chicken cross the road?

to do their job and help things grow

so flap flap flap your wings!

scratch the dirt and wiggle things.

cross the road with a big hooray

chickens made your food today.

chickens eat, chickens cluck

no quacks quite like a duck

but they give us eggs and plants that grow

and that's why chickens steal the show

so flap flap flap your wings!

scratch the dirt and wiggle things.

cross the road with a big hooray

both chickens and eggs come first we say.

chickens sleep in coops at night

have feathers but can't sustain flight

but they give us eggs and plants that grow

and that's why chickens steal the show.

They promised us a better way.

With prices fixed and rules to play.

They said the market's too wild and free

Could never bring us harmony.

But now the shelves are empty here.

We're promised more in a year.

The dreams they sold have turned to dust.

In planned economy we don't trust.

Price controls they tie our hands.

Definitionally a broken plan.

Makes a great campaign and votes gained.

But any help that's claimed comes with chains.

Minimum wage, they set it high.

Just a control on labor's price.

They said it's fair, they said it's right.

Now robots do those jobs at night.

No such thing as a price too steep.

It's just the market's call to meet.

The need that rises clear and loud.

Shortage signaled, solved by the crowd.

Price controls they bind our feet.

Eliminate the will to compete.

You say greed, I say supply.

Can't rely on altruism, guy.

If you ban prices rising high.

All it does is fuel the lie.

If goods are scarce the lines grow long.

Make markets bare, black markets strong.

Means stuff for me, but not for thee.

All the expertise of the DMV.

Send the signal and get the goods.

Don't need the state, don't need Tom Woods.

So let the markets lead again.

Prices show both what and when.

No feel-good fluff legislation.

We can't change nature with a pen.

Twenty new hires (nothing else worth mentioning) 

stats dumpster fire (but it's not worth questioning) 

It's all great news, we're a reorg away

from profitability

Office is quiet (for more focused energy)

Desks may be empty (but that's just efficiency)

Pivoting excellence, disrupting space 

A Ted talk smile on my face

Great news, great news, everything's fantastic 

Our growth is organic (and our cuts are so drastic) 

Great news, great news, we're ahead of the curve 

ignore the layoffs, it's the success we deserve

No raises this quarter, but think of the pride you'll feel 

No bonuses to distract from our purpose so real 

retirement matching? That's old-fashioned thinking, friend 

We're investing in your growth (that's where the benefits end)

Reorg departments (bringing synergistic flow)

Everyone's quitting (that's a signal of greatness)

Investors are running, surely you know

that means profit -buhdum-ching-

Great news, great news, everything's fantastic 

Our growth is organic (though our cuts are quite drastic) 

Great news, great news, we're ahead of the curve 

ignore the layoffs, it's the success we deserve

Let's circle back and touch base soon.  

We need to pivot by this afternoon.  

Leverage our synergy, make it lean  

Best practices for the winning team.  

We're disrupting paradigms with actionable insights  

Leveraging our core competencies, reaching new heights  

Think outside the box, it's a win-win game  

In this ecosystem of corporate speak, we all sound the same  

Let's drill down on the deliverables  

Right size our solutions, make them scalable  

Low hanging fruit and quick wins to grab  

What we ideate in our innovation lab  

At the end of the day  

We'll move the needle in a big way  

Take it offline, then we'll reconvene  

to optimize our customer journey machine  

We're disrupting paradigms with actionable insights  

Leveraging our core competencies, reaching new heights  

Think outside the box, it's a win-win game  

In this ecosystem of corporate speak, we all sound the same  

So let's align our stakeholder vision  

Make data driven decisions  

Cause when we sing in corporate tounge  

We sound like robots, not humans.

Jenkins walked down a dark lonely road

Confusion heavy, a mind that never slowed.

With containers in hand, he staggered and swayed

But through the haze, he tried oh how he prayed.

Oh Jenkins where did you go wrong?

Lost in the cloud, but you kept moving along.

Intoxicated dreams you did your best.

But Github actions had a plan, laid your soul to rest.

You stumbled through shadows, no place to be.

Slack chat full of questions, trying to break free.

The pipelines spun around him, a twisted carousel.

But Jenkins just laughed at the tolling of the bell.

Oh Jenkins where did you go wrong?

Lost in the cloud, but you kept moving along.

Intoxicated dreams you did your best.

But Github actions had a plan, laid your soul to rest.

He whispered to the stars, just show me the way.

But the moon only sighed, as it started to fade.

In the end he was found still a smile on his face.

And the same little mustache, bowtie, and cliches.

Oh Jenkins where did you go wrong?

Running Bash inside Groovy inside Java all along.

Convoluted schemes you did your best.

But devops had a plan, laid your soul to rest.

Now the reflogs remember the steps that he took.

A tale of a man in the corners of a book.

Jenkins you wandered but you found your way

To your final deployment at the end of the day