SHOW / EPISODE

Sex & Sleep: Was It Good For You?

38m | Jul 5, 2023

In this episode

  • Why sex and sleep are surprisingly difficult to study in a laboratory
  • How at-home sleep technology may make naturalistic research more practical
  • The difference between association, mechanism and an actual sleep intervention
  • Why trying too hard can interfere with both sleep and sexual function
  • Performance anxiety and the danger of turning intimacy into another sleep obligation
  • Why "good sex" does not automatically mean orgasm
  • Jade Wu on embodied attention, mindfulness and getting out of the insomnia thought loop
  • Wendy Troxel on relationship safety, vigilance and sleep as a social behavior
  • Michael Grandner on conditioned arousal and why the bed should not become "the dentist chair"
  • Cheryl Carroll on "bed dread" and making the bedroom feel safe rather than threatening
  • How fertility-related performance pressure can affect both sex and sleep
  • Why sleeping apart does not automatically mean relationship trouble
  • Possible psychological and physiological pathways linking intimacy with sleep
  • What later research found about partnered sex, orgasm, masturbation and sleep
  • The 2025 pilot study that measured sexual activity and sleep with at-home polysomnography
  • What newer research says about insomnia, sexual satisfaction and sexual dysfunction
  • A 2026 correction to the episode's statement about sleep deprivation and testosterone
  • Why the panel ultimately resists turning sex into a standardized sleep prescription


About the panel

Dr. Michael Grandner is a licensed clinical psychologist certified in behavioral sleep medicine and a professor at the University of Arizona. He directs the Sleep and Health Research Program and the Behavioral Sleep Medicine Clinic. His research examines sleep health, insufficient sleep, sleep disparities and the relationship between sleep and cardiometabolic and daytime functioning.

University of Arizona profile

Dr. Jade Wu is a board-certified sleep psychologist, researcher and author of Hello Sleep: The Science and Art of Overcoming Insomnia Without Medications. Her current research at Duke University School of Medicine focuses on treating sleep disorders in people with chronic illness.

Duke University profile

Dr. Wendy Troxel is a senior behavioral and social scientist at RAND, a licensed clinical psychologist specializing in behavioral sleep medicine, and an adjunct professor at the University of Pittsburgh and University of Utah. She is the author of Sharing the Covers: Every Couple's Guide to Better Sleep and is internationally recognized for research on sleep in couples and relationships.

RAND profile

Cheryl Carroll, DNP, CNM, PMHNP-BC, PMHCNS-BC, CST, is a women's-health and mental-health clinician and an AASECT-certified sex therapist with more than thirty years of experience. She now owns StrongTower Counseling and Education in Durham, North Carolina, where she works with individuals, couples and families.

StrongTower Counseling and Education

MENTIONED

Congresswoman Stacey Plaskett and Her Surprising Sleep Routine

The earlier Snooze Button episode that started the sleep-and-sex question.

Listen / read the episode

Please Don't Make Us Call It a Sleep Divorce

Neil's earlier conversation with Wendy Troxel about couples who sleep separately and what that choice does — and does not — say about a relationship.

Listen / read the episode

Hello Sleep — Jade Wu

Wu's book on insomnia, behavioral sleep medicine and building a healthier relationship with sleep.

Duke University on Hello Sleep

Sharing the Covers — Wendy Troxel

Troxel's book on sleep in couples and the intersection of sleep, relationships and health.

Wendy Troxel at RAND

Sex and Sleep: Perceptions of Sex as a Sleep Promoting Behavior in the General Adult Population

The 2019 survey study showing that many adults perceive sexual activity involving orgasm as helpful for subsequent sleep.

Read the study

The influence of sexual activity on sleep: A diary study

The 2023 study that followed sexual activity and subjective sleep across fourteen days.

Read the study

Sleep on it: A pilot study exploring the impact of sexual activity on sleep outcomes in cohabiting couples

The 2025 pilot study using portable polysomnography in participants' homes — a practical answer to one of the methodological problems debated in this episode.

Read the study

Relationship of insomnia to sexual function and sexual satisfaction: Findings from the Sleep and Sex Survey II

A 2023 study of 1,266 adults examining insomnia severity, sexual function and sexual satisfaction.

Read the study

Effect of partial and total sleep deprivation on serum testosterone in healthy males

The systematic review and meta-analysis used for the archive correction to the episode's testosterone discussion.

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