The Priest Who Said He Watched Jesus Die: Exploring Unhinged Time Travel

Cyndi Lauper said it best — time after time — and this week, Selene and Pascale are tumbling after the truth about time travel. But before they do, they've got a sneak peek at what's coming up next episode: a visit to a serial killer exhibition in Manhattan. The only problem? They can't even agree on what makes a murder interesting before they've walked through the door — crimes of passion versus the cold randomness of serial killers. It's the kind of debate that reveals exactly where these two besties are psychologically, and neither one is budging an inch.

And then the time travel rabbit hole opens up.

Story #1: The Dodleston Messages. In 1984, a schoolteacher in a creaky Welsh border cottage borrowed a computer from his school — back when computers were basically fancy typewriters — and started receiving mysterious messages from someone claiming to live in the 16th century under Henry VIII. Oh, and also from someone in the year 2109 warning them they were messing with history. The messages went on for two years. There were footprints. There was a ghost with six toes. There was a pub trip. Pascale calls it "a show that went on two seasons too long," and she's not wrong.

Story #2: The Chronovisor. A Benedictine priest, a secret Vatican conspiracy, a cast of post-WWII physicists (some of them Nazi-adjacent, which — yikes), and a device supposedly built to watch events from the past like a View-Master. Including, allegedly, the crucifixion. The Pope said "great, let's show everyone!" and then immediately said "actually, let's lock it in the vault forever." Selene has thoughts. Many thoughts. So does the Vatican, apparently — they've never denied it.

Also in this episode: Stephen Hawking and Michio Kaku weigh in on whether time travel is actually possible (spoiler: don't rule it out), a detour into crimes of passion vs. serial killers, the theological chaos of Abraham nearly sacrificing his kid, Roddy Piper's paranormal cult film They Live, candle theft at St. Patrick's Cathedral, and a quick true crime update on Polly from the Nirvana song— yes, she got away, and yes, the kidnapper literally ran out of gas.

It's part rogue physics conjecture, part Vatican conspiracy theory, part true crime detour — plus the kind of warm and wild bestie banter that makes the world feel a little less douchy for an hour.

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